Phi Alpha Theta held the last event of their Women’s History Month Film Festival on Tuesday, March 26.
The event included the film “Pork Chop Day” and a lecture by Joy Rogers, the director for Northwest Safeline, a hotline that helps victims of domestic violence, which is open 24 hours a day, 365 days a year.
The film “Pork Chop Day” is a documentary about Debbie Knapp, the first woman to be paroled from a life sentence in the state of Tennessee, who received that life sentence for killing her abusive husband. The news that she was being paroled came in the dining hall on pork chop day, a special meal for the prisoners. Knapp was released after 21 years.
In her lecture, Rogers discussed past legal issues that made complicated any legal recourse for women who suffered from domestic violence. Rape was long considered a crime against the woman’s husband or father, except for when an African-American woman was raped, in which case it was not even considered a crime.
Northwest Safeline, formed in 1985 by a group of concerned citizens, serves the counties of Weakley, Obion, Lake, Tipton, Dyer and Lauderdale. The organization serves anyone who is a victim of domestic abuse: men, women and members of the LGBTQ community. In addition to the hotline, Northwest Safeline also provides services such as professional counseling, a confidential shelter in Dyer County and one in Obion County, legal advocacy for orders of protection, personal advocacy, community education and financial assistance for food, rent, clothing and utilities for those leaving an abusive situation who need it.
Northwest Safeline does take financial contributions from individuals, but there are also other ways to help.
“We also take household goods, we take volunteers for the hotline, but the biggest thing I’d like to ask you is to remember our name, Northwest Safeline, and tell people that you know about it,” Rogers said.
Whether here in Martin or elsewhere, Rogers encouraged students to be aware and available for those who need help.
“In most anywhere in the country where you might go to live after you graduate from UT here at Martin, there will be an agency that serves victims of domestic violence. Make sure you know what the name of that agency is, because you just never know when you might need to help someone in a crisis, whether it be a woman or a gentleman,” Rogers said.
“… Even if you don’t think you’re making an impact, you can sometimes just plant seeds. … You never know about those seeds that you’ve planted, they can really make a difference.”
Rogers said that abusers take advantage of the knight and the princess fantasy.
“It starts off with the honeymoon phase when the guy is great and he’s wonderful and so sweet and everything’s perfect. And then it goes to the tension building phase, and you know he’s not quite as happy and he’s edgy and you’re trying to do everything right,” Rogers said.
“At some point, the tension builds enough that there’s an explosion and an incident of violence. Then after that it moves back into the honeymoon phase, and he’s sorry and he’s never going to do it again and ‘please forgive me’ and ‘it wasn’t my fault’ and ‘you made me mad.’ It’s always the victim’s fault. … As time progresses, that circle gets tighter and tighter, [until] where the honeymoon phases are shorter and shorter and the tension building is longer and the explosions are more frequent.”
For someone you know who is in an abusive relationship, Rogers advised that simply being supportive was important; doing things to build up that person’s self-esteem, encouraging him/her to leave and giving them the number of a hotline or shelter are ways to help.
“It really should be one strike and you’re out. If, for any of you ladies, a boy hits you, don’t give him another chance. No matter what he says, it will happen again,” Rogers said.
The numbers for Northwest Safeline are 731-287-SAFE (7233) and 800-957-0055.
